funny stuff!
by Dark nite 45
Summary: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha


Hi my name is Jasmin but people call me Jazzy or Spazzy Jazzy which is ok with me because sometimes I do go a little bit spazzy, when I want to but hey everyone has their moments don't they??? Well if u don't , don't look at me, well anyway here are my stories if you like them make sure that u LAUGH and I fu don't like them then buggar off I don't want you reading my stories. But before we get to my stories I think you need to know a little bit more about me well here they are………….

Things I like:

nice people  
sarcastic people that remind of me of me  
people that are weirder than me  
my friends  
classic muscle cars like the 1967 Chevy impala  
scaring the crap out of people I hate  
sleeping in  
being sarcastic and hanging out with my friends (me myself and I)

Things I hate:

Let's see... teacher's  
English  
math people that look down on me Brussels sprouts broccoli nasty people and lots more

My friends:

Jordan, Taylah, Tara, Tori, Karolina, Pebbles, Sonny, and lots more

Guns don't kill people, people kill people. The guns just make it easier

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed

Remember: some people are only alive because illegal to shoot them

People say I have split personalities. We disagree

I love work. It fishnets me. I sit and watch it for hours

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

Hitler killed people with blond and blue eyes. You count your blessings. I haven't resurrected him yet to kill you

The electric chair was invented by a dentist, if you're now more scared of the dentist now then join the club. We have badges

1 out of every 4 people are insane, look at your 3 friends, if it's not them then it's you

Evening news is when they begin with "good evening" and you proceed to tell them why it isn't

I can only please one person a day, today's not your day, tomorrows not looking good for you either

There's nothing wrong with arguing with you. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.

Therapist = the/rapist... scary thought

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, and I laugh even harder

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?"

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I agree with the dictionary. Gals before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

_Friends bail you out of jail while a best friends in the room next to you going "THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!"_

.) You go to a party sit down and take MySpace picas

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have a screen name or MySpace

4.) you'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of getting up and pushing the buttons on the T.V.

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling

8.) As you read this list you keep thinking about sending it to your friends

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5

10.) You just scrolled up to look at number five

11.) Your laughing stupidly at yourself

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for this, and you know you did

_Apparently 1 in 5 people on this earth are Chinese there are five in my family it's either my mom or dad, by older brother Collin, or my other brother Ho-cha-cha-chu, I think it's Collin._


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